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Thursday, 13 September 2007

  • Back Again..

    Inspired, that's what you think

    I blame myself for everything

    I easily breakdown

    Still, Im used to it

     

    My life will be incomplete

    without having these wounds

    I got lots of imperfections

    But im a perfectionist

     

    I wonder why life,

    makes me feel joy at a moment

    But that will only be just for a moment

     

    I should not feel this pain

    I couldn't handle it anymore

    any longer and much more for a lifetime

     

    I want to cry and shout

    My heart is already drowning

    and not anymore in action

    World's so cruel with me..

     

    Hatred overflowed

    and I can't even tell a single word

    nor can't show a single action

    to someone whom i should blame

     

    I have to...

    just to save myself

    it's really really hard for me

    to do this things and to feel this way

     

    I have to survive

    and forget the pain

    I want to heal the wounds

    and try reflecting myself  BACK AGAIN...

     

                             -cel-

     

Sunday, 12 August 2007

  • Currently Reading
    A Hand to Guide Me
    By Denzel Washington
    see related

    half bleeding

     I promise one thing,
    not to cry for some love loses.
    Why don't i deserve happiness?
    is it because I'm not worthy?

    I know it won't be perfect
    But i'm trying to make it better
    I know its hard to avoid temptations
    But i didn't expect it will come through.

    I felt so much pain deep inside
    I was hurt a lot knowing that his attention
    was not anymore in me
    I was avoiding every Satan's deeds
    But knowing that it wasn't don in me
    hurts a lot more bigger.

    I can't close my eyes coz im afraid,
    afraid of losing what im having now.
    I know things won't last forever
    and things will go wrong as time goes.

    Im pretending to feel better
    Pretending that everything doesn't mean,
    but seems like im being such a fool
    believing in lies and wannabes.

    A great damage happened in me
    A destruction nearby to vanish
    It will all be gone in a sudden
    and all those were just memories of yesterday.

             -cel22-




Sunday, 29 July 2007